Here's the Scoop by Brian Sweeney

Brian Sweeney has been the author of “Here’s the Scoop” for more than 20 years. The column usually deals with the lighter side of life and the writer has been known to mix a bit of fiction in with the facts. Brian has received six awards for his column in the annual New York Press Association’s Better Newspaper Contest.

Here's the Scoop: September 7, 2011

Storm clouds still linger
When I awoke last Tuesday, I realized that we were running low on some of the staples in the food department — chips, cheese, seltzer, coffee, bagels. My plans for the day ran through my head, trying to figure out a good time to drop into Freshtown to pick up these items.


Here's the Scoop: August 24, 2011

You can’t wear that!
I guess it’s simply a difficult Situation. Especially if you’re the clothing company Abercrombie & Fitch (A&F).

The news broke last week that A&F has offered to pay Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino to not wear its clothing on the “hit” show “Jersey Shore.” In a day when “product placement” is so highly sought after, this is a very unusual move indeed.


Here's the Scoop: August 17, 2011

Mob mentality
I have a theory that once I become aware of a trend, it’s time for the trend to be over.
This rule of thumb usually works pretty well, especially since I’m sort of slow to realize that a trend has even occurred. So, by the time I figure out such things, the trend should be well past its prime.


Here's the Scoop: August 10, 2011

New at showering
I attended my first bridal shower over the weekend. Interesting stuff.
Actually, I didn’t exactly get invited to the shower. Nor did I crash the event. The shower came to me.

In reality, I was at the post-bridal shower. After the strippers had left.
You see, when my wife headed out for a day of fun at the bridal shower, I was left home to contend with the massive task of replenishing the firewood pile. Ordinarily, I take pleasure in such work. Just not in the rain. Makes things worse when I know that others in my family are off having fun.


Here's the Scoop: August 3, 2011

When duty calls
I did my duty last week. Almost.
The fact is, I reported for Jury Duty, as instructed. Then, we were all sent home when the case was settled just moments before jury selection. Apparently, that kind of thing happens a lot.
Even though so many cases are settled out of court doesn’t release anyone from their obligation of showing up and possibly being selected to serve on a jury. So, off I went to Delhi to see if I would be called upon to decide someone’s fate. Real power.