Here's the Scoop: July 16, 2014

It’s raining — what?
The weather, as they say, is a changing. No argument here. Still, am I the only one who is growing just a tiny bit tired of just about every forecast including words like “severe, warning, damaging,,” etc.?
Like most people, I have witnessed plenty of weather-related destruction in recent years. Things are definitely “different.” On the other hand, I think some of the forecasters may be going a bit overboard by turning every period of precipitation into a life-threatening downpour. What happened to a gentle summer rain?
While I certainly do appreciate knowing when bad weather will strike, it’s gotten to the point where I largely ignore forecasts. They cut into real life too much.
The other day, we were planning to go out for a bike ride and my wife asked me to check the radar. In this case, I thought it was a good idea since riding in the rain in not high on my list of enjoyable activities.

In your face
Naturally, when I went online, the first thing that struck me (not lightning, fortunately) was a blaring warning in red: “Thunderstorms, some heavy, tomorrow afternoon through Tuesday afternoon; storms can bring downpours, large hail, damaging winds and falling trolls.”
Actually, I added the part about the “trolls” myself, to see if my wife was paying attention. Surprisingly, she was. We agreed that it would be really cool to see the folks from the Weather Channel standing outside amidst howling winds, getting pummeled with trolls. Even the LL Bean parkas couldn’t protect them from such a force of nature.
While I haven’t seen any actual forecasts that involve trolls, it’s only a matter of time. After all, if the weather folks can’t keep us excited (scared), we probably won’t tune in. Too late for me. I have seen floods. I have seen large amounts of snow. I have seen people shoveling big snow piles. I have even performed this task myself. I’m not tuning in anymore.

Gonna be bad ...
I also like the new ploy of opening a weather-related website and reading: “Severe storm warnings for five states.” Naturally, most folks would rush to see if they’re in this 10 percent of the state that may get whacked. Me, I like those odds, so I try to pass on clicking on such headlines.
The really weird thing about the weather reports is that even when the predictions for destructive “events” are true — posted right next to these warnings is an online ad touting great rates on insurance. Ironic, huh. It’s probably too late at that point anyhow.
Of course, everyone knows that no one reads online ads — especially when they are scared to death of impending weather doom. It’s even worse when trolls are part of the forecast.
— Brian Sweeney